1. A visit to a DIY store... alone. Yes. As I headed off to B&Q (other quality DIY stores are available - although rapidly disappearing!) I didn't for one minute pause to consider, or even question, the rashness of my actions or the hastiness of my feminine decision. No, I set off in the car to buy some woodchips for the gardener to lay down tomorrow (yes, don't scoff, I have a gardener... With two gardens - one laid with woodchips and one fresh with newly sprung grass - and many episodes of Master Chef, Great British Menu and The Apprentice to catch up on, it is essential for any modern living, on-trend couple to have a gardener!...). Naively, I circumnavigated the store until I found my treasure, grabbed myself a trolley and heaved two ENORMOUS bags of woodchips onto the wooden flatbed. Ta daaaaa... I congratulated myself: Well done Maggie; you are strong, independent, woodchip buying female. Excellent. Now to the till.
This was when I realised that B&Q make trolleys that will only move for men. Yes. Only men. How do I know this? Because there were several other people around me in the store, merrily pushing their trolleys around without a care in the world; all were men. My trolley and I however were firmly grounded where we had begun; it seems in laying my load upon my trolley, I had inadvertently wedged it between the display of woodchips and it's own immovable wheels. We were stuck. I pushed, I pulled, I twisted and heaved... until 'Can I help you there Madam? you seem to be having a few problems'.
My woodchip buying experience had turned into quite an adventure so it was no surprise, when I reached my car, that the boot (that has not had a problem, that I've failed to get fixed, for the last 6 months) refused to open and I had to haul the ENORMOUS bags of woodchips into the back seats of my 3-door Micra, covering me in wet, red dye and teeny bits of woodchips. However, what was more upsetting was that
Returning home, proud of myself I concluded my scientific investigation with the final incident...
3. I asked Mik to carry the woodchips from the car, into the garden. I didn't attempt it myself... I didn't even consider attempting it myself... I shamelessly, with full pride and dignity, played my helpless female card: 'It's just too heavy for me... thanks...'
So, to summarise, on evaluation of the incidents documented above, which took place within a time period of just 2 hours today, I have can conclude that the following statement is a clear, proven and fully evidenced fact: I am a girl.